Feeling Lethal? SkyMall Catolog Has Just the Thing

Merchandise can take a sinister turn, given the right mood
By Kate Rockwood,  Newser Staff
Posted May 8, 2008 8:09 PM CDT
Feeling Lethal? SkyMall Catolog Has Just the Thing
The Batman Begins Can Sword is 39 inches of stainless steel.   (Noble Collection)

Browsing airplane catalogs already hints at a certain crazed desperation. But just in case that yapping businessman on your flight pushes you into a homicidal rage, Jezebel points out that SkyMall merch can also facilitate murder (first, allow 4-6 weeks for delivery):

  1. Lawn Aerator Sandals: 1.5-inch spikes covering the soles easily dig holes in your lawn. Happily, they also turn a swift kick deadly.

  1. BodyGard 5-In-1 Emergency Tool: The seat-belt cutter and automatic glass breaker provide twice the homicidal options; a built-in flashlight makes hiding the body a snap.
  2. Batman Begins Cane Sword: 39 inches of stainless steel ready to slice and dice any villains that cross your path (or, you know, annoying fellow travelers).
  3. Classic Ball-Shooting Burp Gun: These plastic balls will barely sting your foe when shot; the trick is to ram them down his throat and wait for suffocation.

Click the link for more murderous merch. (More murder stories.)

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