Hot Dating Trend: Brutal Honesty

Daters are apparently skipping the small talk and going straight for the jugular. That's "hot take dating," and USA Today reports it's a controversial new dating trend gaining traction. The premise is simple and obviously explosive: Before forming any kind of rapport or covering the basics like work, family, and hobbies, daters are diving straight into sensitive topics like core values, politics, and religion. Proponents say the goal isn't to shock for sport, but to save time by thoroughly laying out hidden dealbreakers early to avoid weeks or months of mismatched expectations. In a dating landscape shaped by endless swiping and burnout, brutal honesty up front may be more efficient than polite ambiguity.

According to Tinder's Year In Swipe 2025 report, 37% of singles say shared values are essential for dating, though almost half (46%) say they would date someone with opposing political views. "This isn't about being divisive," the report says. "It's about being authentic." The survey also revealed the biggest dealbreakers: racial justice (37%), family views (36%), and LGBTQ+ rights (32%). But Blaine Anderson, a dating coach for men, cautions that leading with your strongest opinions can easily backfire when it comes across as combative or inflexible. "By sharing your most extreme viewpoints, it's very easy to come off as an extreme person," he said. "Where hot take dating can go wrong is giving the illusion that you are rigid or inflexible in your views."

Of course, none of this is to say that discussing values on a date has ever been a bad idea. Relationship experts generally agree that shared values matter—and that avoiding them entirely can waste everyone's time. What's new is the timing and tone: Hot take dating pushes the really hard conversations to the very front, sometimes before any of the usual niceties. At least one Vice contributor is sold. Sammi Caramela frames hot take dating as a corrective to over-accommodating behavior, arguing that it helps daters avoid shrinking themselves just to maintain a connection: "Hot-take dating ensures you're grounded in your truth and unwilling to settle for less."